‘A friend in need is a friend indeed…certainly not in today’s time. Today a winner is someone who wins, who gets promoted, who gains, who is rich, who has it all even though they sabotage the interest of others. In this rat race who has the time to bother about the one who stumbles; who has the energy to help someone in need; and who has the patience to give an ear to someone who has a different story to narrate? A thing is loved and people are used and that’s what is modern world about! Isn’t it? Did I not know it? And yet, why did I expect? And why would someone be part of my struggle? And who understands a divorced woman in today’s society? She must be too difficult. She must be too rebellious. Loyalty must be tough for her! Excetra ….excetra … The list will go on and it will be lifelong…why would someone deal with all this? It is my choice alone and I have to deal with it alone. Do I have another alternative? No, I do not. I wish I had, but sadly no. I understand. I understand it all, Sikha!’ Deepali thought as she kept looking at her little child, Atul deciding to take a different trajectory in her life.
‘Did I do it right? Well, it must be a spur-of-the-moment decision! Two days and she will be alright. I mean, common who thinks such extreme steps! And she has a child to raise. She has always been emotional and life needs to be lived practically. And I think I have been honestly hindering the space between Prakash & Deepali. I mean what if I did not exist? The couple would sort it out as the rest of them do. Is it because I am always available for her? Does she think I am an escape route? She does not understand this world that is obsessed with normalcy. People who take a different turn only know it. Look at me! I am not married ….yet and every single look at me outside asks me this question, bloody every single day! As if my marriage will solve the problem of this whole wide world! Ridiculous. I will be forgotten the moment I die. What if I meet with an accident? What if I get kidnapped and stolen to some underworld? Will the ones worried about me not being married suffer my absence? No right! I think Deepali just needs a little space and maybe I do too. I will see her in two days. Wait she would not dare something extreme! Na … She promised me that day already. Ahhhh …. She will be fine!’ Sikha’s mind was busy thinking about all kinds of perspectives.
‘How can she behave as if she has forgotten everything? After everything I did for her! Is it that easy for her? Why do I behave like it mattered a lot? All these years and I haven’t been able to forget a single moment, her smile, the conversations, her voice …. Why the hell is everything so fresh in my memory after all these years? Was it all lost at that moment? Why do I always end up being hurt by my own expectations? We did not make any commitment. She is not wrong if she has proceeded with time. Why am I getting hurt here? Well, I will show her what moving on means. She will meet a new Manav tomorrow! Wait and watch Sikha !’, Manav contemplated as he lay on the bed, looking at the ceiling.
PS: To be continued.
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3 Comments Add yours
Oho.. all three characters going through internal dilemma and turmoil
The stream of consciousness technique so well used, Chinmayee!
You have so wonderfully portrayed the inner dilemmas of the three characters