Deepali ran back to her room hearing the outcry of her baby. Her heart sank to see her baby in tears. The baby had fallen off the edge of the bed and was in a disoriented position. It was a miracle that the head had not been injured! The helplessness in the little eyes was as if asking so many questions. The mother in her was enraged and furious.

And her husband stood near the window with his earphones plugged into his ears while he was busy scrolling his phone, completely unaware of his surrounding.

“Prakash !!! What the hell are you even doing? My baby !!” Deepali stormed into the room and picked up her baby while her husband almost got a shock attack after listening to her screaming!

What is it? I was just busy…

The child gripped onto the mother as if a tiny bird had found a safe nest. Deepali quickly checked for any injury. Thankfully there was none!

“You were… what? Busy with …what? Answer me, Prakash. Why has that mobile become so important that you can not even take care of the baby when I am attending a phone call?”

 “Prakash came running and tried to examine for any injuries. “ He is fine! What is the fuss about? We used to fall so many times when we were kids! Why are you making it such a big issue?”

 “You are just impossible, Prakash! I mean .. ”.Deepali stormed out of the room.

After about one odd hour, the baby stopped crying and fell asleep in the arms of his mother. Deepali kissed the forehead and held him close to her aching heart. Tears dropped from her eyes.   It felt like yesterday, when…

***

 “ I love you, Deepali! I really do! And I just can not think of anything else when you are not with me. I mean it”, Prakash had proposed to her after their graduating ceremony.

She had then paused and looked deep into his eyes. Men can put up the best act possible to get their heart’s desire fulfilled but a woman can read their eyes if she really wants to. And she had melted seeing the truth in his eyes!

After a fortnight they both agreed to give love a chance. And next three years were the best years that Deepali could imagine. Prakash was truly, madly, and deeply in love with her. And when a man loves a woman, she knows how it feels.  It was not the grand gestures but the little acts that had touched her heart. The families agreed and they soon got married.  And the first year was in fact like a dream for the newlywed couple.

It was Prakash who wanted the child though Deepali was not mentally ready. But then sooner or later, she had to be a mother, she had also prepared herself to welcome a new life. But surprisingly, things slowly started changing when Deepali developed her baby bump after the first trimester.  Instead of being protective of his pregnant wife, Prakash slowly started staying late at work. It was hard to recall when their hour-long conversations became mundane question & answer sessions. She missed laughing her heart out to silly jokes that Prakash would crack just to see her smile. Somehow everything between them seemed transactional.

The premature birth and Deepali’s deteriorating health compelled her to quit her job and become a housewife. She had to give up her independence for her child and she never had the time to even think whether her decision was right or wrong. Prakash had become a workaholic with time. They would go days without speaking to each other. And the entire responsibility of running the household had shifted onto her shoulders.

Where did all the love go and when?

***

She was shaken back to reality when the baby shifted positions in her lap. She slowly put the baby on the bed. And dialed her phone. The phone got connected instantly.

“Hello, Sikha! Deepali here. I can’t take it anymore. The thoughts are becoming stronger. I feel lonelier than ever! I want to end it… end my life forever! It’s just that I only feel deeply for my child. I am exhausted. I  just can’t anymore…”

“Hellooo! Deepali, I am reaching your place in forty-odd minutes and I dare you! If I do something stupid. I will bring you alive and then kill you again! Wait for me.”

There was a pause as Deepali struggled to control her tears.

“Answer me, goddam it! Will you?”, roared Shikha from the other end.

PS: To be continued.

This blog post is written for #BlogchatterA2Z2023

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To read the previous parts please click the below letters

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I have written three books that are available on Amazon and you can click the links below to get your copy!

1. Five Petals
2. Heartfelt Symphonies
3. Traces & Memoirs: Stories of You and Me

Love,

Chinmayee