Live & let live.

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Human beings are the most complex beings of all. Probably because they are the most intelligent ones. But does it mean being such creatures , we ought to ‘intelligently’ dig our own graves ? Well, today we are doing just that. There are certain things that have been bothering me since last week & unless I write them down , I do not think I will be able to take them off my mind.

I work in the legal field ( No, you guessed it wrong, I am not a lawyer) and every day there are tons of cases that I come across, sometimes even images, that can make one feel nauseous. It used to affect me at the early stages of my career but then with time, I was able to draw a line where these instances normally do not affect me anymore. And I have successfully detached myself personally from the professional aspects that seem a little worrisome. However, on some rare occasions like a detailed discussion by some colleagues does have an effect. This is one such case.

The victim was close to one of my colleagues .It was an arranged marriage. The problems started from the beginning itself when the bride, in her early twenties could not dance to the tune of her in-laws. She did everything but what happens in a closed room with the man one marries, will only be known to the person concerned.The husband had an illegal relationship with someone else but lacked the spine to confront the truth in front of his parents. Hence , he agreed to get married so that he can continue to live his life by cheating his own wife. Of course, with time, it became difficult & the girl came back to her own house, back to her parent’s place.

Society always curses a girl who returns back home leaving her marital home. And in this case too, it was the same. But the parents of the girl were brave enough to absorb all this shock & supported her in her decision. After a couple of months, the husband visited her and after a lot of persuasion succeeded in convincing his wife & her family that he had changed for good. And to save any relationship, one has to give it chances, forgive little fights, overcome each other’s grey areas, and constantly try to work it out. The girl and the family must have thought about these positive aspects and believed the man. The girl changed her decision and moved back to her husband’s house only to be found killed the next day. The husband and his family ( probably ) were involved had constricted her throat and then had made her drink poison so that it seemed to be a case of suicide. The investigation is on but it seems the guys have money power & have hired the one of the best criminal lawyers. Well, what happens, only time will say! I heard the whole discussion but managed not to get affected though the story somehow stayed with me!

However, when I recently watched the movie Gehraiyan starring Deepika Padukone, everything came rushing back again. The scene where the protagonists who were head over heels in love with each other ( and had created a life, though it was an accident ) try to kill each other! That scene was disturbing as I connected it with the narrative that I had heard in my office. I mean, it is only natural for somethings to work out and some things just do not. But the unparalleled complexity of human behavior that was displayed in the movie did have an impact on me.

You disagree with someone, part ways if it affects you so much and does not work out after giving it your best. You do not like someone, say it. You like someone, say it. I understand my readers would be thinking that it is not easy. Yes, it is not but at least this makes things easier in the long run. What does living a lie & then killing someone for revenge yield finally? Can hate, anger & greed be so big that it paralyzes a logical human being to the extent that he starts behaving like a complete fool? Yes, most probably it does. Otherwise, there would not be rising cases of domestic violence. Only a minuscule get registered and a lot just never comes to the surface.

Like abstract paintings, we all carry different colors patterns within us, but there is always a way to co-habit, there is always a solution to a problem provided there is transparency & communication in a bond. But killing someone, blackmailing someone and thinking that you are great enough to escape the law or the karmic consequences that follow , is really a very stupid idea as per me.

I think, understanding & appreciating the differences within us can help us create a more conducive environment, where we accept each other , work on our differences, celebrate our similarities & I think what an abstract painting it can we all create ! But I guess, we at least first need to understand that we are human beings, which many have forgotten these days because being humane is such a rare phenomenon in today’s world.

So, live & let live!

Love,

Chinmayee

4 Comments Add yours

  1. Matheikal says:

    Relationships are hard to maintain and yet how hollow life is without them? A willingness to understand and accept the otherness of the other can make the going easy and even sweet.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I totally agree with you, sir . It’s one of the toughest job to do.

      Like

  2. We adjust with many for different reasons. Such compromises are nowhere scene in our relationships. Going till the extreme murder is barbaric. It is an assault of our confidence on humanity.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly. But people fail to understand as human behaviour is very complex.

      Liked by 1 person

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