It was 2012 and now it is 2024. Twelve years apart what has changed? A lot, I guess… the rise of smartphones, the rise of information overload, the rise of influencer culture and so many other things to name a few. What has not changed? Well… it is simple the fear that accompanies a woman! I mean the recent incident about the gruesome harassment has made such ripples that, being a woman has increased the fear of being alive in this almost cannibalistic society. And on top of this every other day, you hear stories that add to this fear. Somewhere it is a baby of three months and somewhere it is an elderly lady of eighty years old! Somewhere the accused is a father and somewhere the accused are your own classmates!

These are hard times to survive, and one wonders what has gone so wrong with us! There was once a time when courting a woman was a privilege! Men understood that it was manly to be able to secure a woman’s love and for that, they had to prove themselves. And only the best of the lot had the chance to be chosen by the woman to be her partner. From age-old times, even Shyamvar Pratha establishes the fact that a man has to prove worthy to be chosen. And even the women understood the meaning of devotion & loyalty. Forget all this, we say we are modern, we say we are educated … but what is the result? A broken society, a society without a conscience!

Why has a woman become an object to be used and then killed brutally? Why does the man think that it is his job to punish by raping the woman he pinpoints and thinks he is a hero if he can do so? They say to have strict laws and punish the culprit immediately but my question is why have we made it so worse in the first place? Why is a boy child preferred? Why is it okay to seek dowry during marriage? why is it ok if a man slaps his wife? why is it the norm for a man to shout at his girlfriend and show that he is manly enough? Why is it okay to even tease college-going girls on the streets? Why is it okay to assume that a single mom or a widowed/divorced woman is okay to be treated as a sex object? Why is it considered cool to be flirting around with multiple girls simultaneously! Why does the discrimination start from the house itself? Why do some women make it okay for the men of the house to humiliate the women of the house?

A lot of questions … right? Well, the point I am trying to make is all these hidden, subtle factors that seem so okay are probably the hidden reason that we have come to a point that as a woman even if we are almost half the population we are always living under a constant fear of saving our pride and our life! On one side we talk about raising a child, giving her an education, and empowering her to be self-sufficient, and on the other hand, we are creating a society where that is slowly becoming immune and almost unmoved to heart-wrenching crimes against women!

Speeches which are in fact blame games among people sitting in power, writing essays among students about women’s safety, and sharing pictures and incidents on social media about such incidents to raise awareness seem like a facade and nothing else. As a personal experience, I can only confess that I have sleepless nights and I am worried about myself and about my family as well like you all are! My question to you my reader is is it all worth it? Are we eligible to be called a civilization? Are we really the most rational beings on this planet earth? And where is manhood that was once looked upon as the protector of womanhood? Is equality of gender never achievable? Do we women always have to live in fear? Is it the fault of the Burqa, the Skirt, or the Saree? Is it our fault that we are women?

Love,

Chinmayee

This post is a part of Blogchatter Half Marathon 2024